pass it on

lately i’ve been doing a lot of thinking about what it means to pass on the testimony of Jesus to the next generation.

Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them slip from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them. deut 4:9

Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.  These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.  Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads.  Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.  deut 6:4-9

in the old testament, moses was preaching to the isrealites about the law he had just received from God.  in my mind i hear moses preaching this like francis chan would, like he was almost begging the people to just understand why it is such an important thing to pass on the testimonies of God.  i bet he got all high pitched and squinted his eyes really tight…

these were the people who had seen and experienced God’s plagues on egypt. these things were AMAZING!!  they’d seen the egyptian army be swept away in the river when it had been parted for them to walk across just a moment before.  they’d eaten the manna and drank water flowing out of a rock.  they’d physically followed the pillar of fire  (of God’s presence) through the wilderness…they KNEW of God’s faithfulness.  (even though they’d been pretty whiny the whole time they were in the desert…) they’d learned so much and had so much to pass along.  moses was begging them not to allow the next generation to not know about the wonders that God did and who the people knew Him to be because of what they’d seen.  moses was begging them to spend their conversation time talking about things that matter!   to take what they’d learned and HELP the next generation to grow up knowing the faithfulness and the awesomeness and the goodness of God.

but the people did let their children forget.  over. and over. and over. the whole OT is just a dirty cycle of people who let their children forget who their God is.the miracles.  the faithful, loving, merciful, HUGE, mighty, God they’d known.  it’s so sad to me.

i don’t want that to be my story.  i want to be like peter and john in acts 4  who no matter what they were being threatened with, they couldn’t stop talking about what they had seen and heard. (v 20)

there is a generation of people growing up right now who are hungry for the Word of God.  they want to know Him and they are willing to spend their lives on it.  i believe in the potential of this generation to do mighty things in Jesus’ Name for the Kingdom of God.  it is the best thing of my life to get to sit across a table from students who want to dig into God’s word…who want to know Him and hear stories of Him and who want to understand how they relate to His Word and the callings He has on their lives. it’s an incredible thing to ask them questions and learn from their responses.  to see Him molding them into the people He has created them to be…with passions and desires to love Him and the people of the world who need Him.

in the last 5 years, i’ve learned SO much from these teenagers.  they keep me on my toes and ask hard questions.  they continually keep me focused in God’s Word and on Him to faithfully lead them toward Him.

tonight  i sat in a family’s living room along with 2 high schoolers just digging into the story of the lost sheep.  you’ve heard it before…probably lots of times.  there are 100 sheep…one walks away…99 are left, but the shepherd goes to find the 1 lost one because He loves it.  it was stinkin incredible.  and they CHOSE it.  they wanted it.  the family invited us into their home but the girls WANTED to be there, doing exactly that on a saturday night.

i normally don’t post things with an agenda.  in fact, i’m pretty against it…but tonight i am asking you to pray for this generation.  they have a zillion things warring for their souls, minds, hearts, and time.  these 2 girls i was with tonight are lucky enough to have parents who are encouraging their kids’ faith, but lots don’t.  lots of kids are seeking the Lord without the guidance of their families at home.  they are so influenced by messages that culture is sending that they (scratch that…WE are so influenced…)that we don’t know what to believe.   we’ve got to be passing on truth to these people.  we can’t let them flounder in a murky pool of messages that are so confusing that they drown in them! we need to fight for them to be leaders, to believe that God has created them for a purpose, to have vision and be driven toward something that is lasting, to be digging into the word with them and together figuring out how that plays out in our lives.  (sorry parents) a 36 on the ACT isn’t the greatest accomplishment of a teenagers life…nor what most of them actually care about.  college is good and fine and i’m glad most of the students i know get to go there, but when they go…do they have a foundation that is solidly built on Christ? that is my greatest hope for them.  that whatever they do they have their eyes set on Jesus.

we need to heed moses’ words to the isrealites or  paul’s words to titus in titus 2, but we are all entrusted with telling the message of Jesus to the next generation. teaching them the things we have learned and sharing with them the word and message of Christ.  i love these kids.  i wish for every teenager i know to have someone who is intentionally loving them and sharing God’s story with them.  one of my favorite things about our church is the relationships.  i love that i have close friends who are 20 and 38 and 51 and 11 and 18…i love that it is like family.  the little sister and the crazy uncle…who do life together in Jesus’ Name. i hope that we are like paul…

We loved you so much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well, because you had become so dear to us. 1 thess 2:8

encouragement

And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.   hebrews 10:24

this week we had a cool opportunity to have a second spring break with some of our students.  the students that make up our ministry come from different schools and different school systems.  the systems don’t play nice with each other so they have different breaks.  we decided to take the opportunity and and run with it.   we ended up with an awesome group of 11 and set out with the goal of encouraging other believers.  we didn’t tell any of the students where we were headed as their parents put them on the bus with us on tuesday.  before the students were given their task, we talked to them about how as believers it is our privilege to be able to “spur one another on” in the faith.  the church is pretty good at sending people to encourage missionaries in other parts of the world or reach out to a non-believer, but  often we forget the part about encouraging one another.

all through the epistles paul writes about encouraging other believers and being encouraged by them…and often this encouragement comes from their letters or from the simple knowledge that they are praying for him.  in romans 1: 11-12 he writes “for i long to see you…that we may be mutually encouraged by each other’s faith, both yours and mine.”

this week we took those 11 students a total of 760 954 miles,  to 65 college students, in 56 hours, to 7 campuses.  to be honest, when we first were talking about doing this i felt a little guilty because i thought that it could possibly be a sort of selfish trip on our part because we were going to see former students and friends that the students with us may not even know.  i knew it would be great to see all the people that we could, but God had so much more in store for us, as He always seems to.

as we showed up at the campuses, we tried to be as stealth as possible to surprise people.  we found people outside class buildings, at coffee shops, in the woods, at their campus ministries, in their dorms…it was so fun (and maybe a little stalkerish…?)!!  we were constantly getting “WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!” and it was wonderful to just be able to say “to see you”.  it was simple.  find them.  chat for a second.  pray for them.  hug, kiss and goodbye.  i like to sit and chat and catch up with people so this in itself was a lesson to me that even if you don’t have an hour to catch up with someone you haven’t seen in awhile, it is totally worth it to take 5 minutes with them to hug and pray.  that you don’t have to talk out every detail to say that you love someone.

i was reminded and amazed at how amazingly good He is to me that He has allowed me to meet and love so many amazing people who are going to be amazing witnesses to the Name of Jesus all over the world. i was reminded at the bigness of the family of God and how it truly is the Spirit within us that binds us together and makes us brothers and sisters.  i am continually thankful that the relationships He gives us with students for the 6 years they are with us don’t end upon graduation but morph into friendships that continue to encourage and grow me in my faith; ones that i pray will be continued on for the long-haul.  these are the students that continually spur me on to live out  my faith and to hold to the beliefs that i say i have.  when i first came into ministry almost 5 years ago now they were the greatest accountability i had—and they didn’t even know it.  through these people that we visited the Lord has shaped my life and my faith so much.  He has given me so much joy and fulness in life through them.

what we didn’t expect though was the ministry we would have to the people we didn’t previously know.  so many times there were other people around when we showed up…since we came unannounced and all.  we got to meet so many new faces because they are friends of our students in college.  being able to meet the people who our friends spend time with was such a blessing in itself, but to be able to pray for them and encourage them was a very unexpected blessing too.

i learned so much this week.  haha just like i say every time i reflect on what God has let me do with these students i am totally blown away that He would let me spend my life with them doing His work.   some of you will laugh because of course i’m finding a way to fit ephesians 4:29 into this post.  i use that scripture all the time, but what i love most about it is that it is reminding us to only speak “only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”

i pray that we did that this week.  and that i will continue to be reminded to encourage and take time to just stop and pray for people and remind them that they are loved…and part of the family of Christ.

thank you Jesus for the opportunity to build up and encourage.  i pray that it is only unto the praise of Your Name. amen

let us not grow weary in doing good for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.  gal 6:9

He will do it

this morning church was just amazing.  i was so happy to be with my church family to worship and fellowship and hear the Word.  this morning God whispered to me something that He’s been telling me for awhile now, but just like He does He showed me how 2 things He’s been speaking go together.  I wasn’t going to post, but i couldn’t get off my mind how much i just wanted to share what He said.

For awhile now He has been teaching me about having courage and just doing what He’s said to do.  i’ve been all afraid of other people’s responses or of failing and falling short, or of just doing something wrong.  for the few weeks leading up to thanksgiving, i felt Him continually speaking to me through ezekiel 36. i knew that He led me there because it’s so stinkin random!  i read and read this passage over a period of weeks and what He spoke through it was that He has plans for us and for the world.  He has things to do and that HE WILL DO THEM.  it is Him that makes things happen…not us.

at least 15 times in ezekiel 36 does God say ,”I WILL…”  He makes promises to us that we can not make happen.  but the thing is according to ezekiel is that He does those things for HIS glory!  He says that He will do things…then  ”You will know that I am the LORD” (v.11) and He goes on to say in v. 21 that He had concern for HIS HOLY NAME.  then v.22 ” Thus says the LORD: “it is not for your sake O Isreal that I am about to act, but for the sake of MY holy name”  He even says that He will totally change our dead hearts into hearts that are alive (v. 26).

but the best part of it is in verse 36.  It says “…I AM the LORD; I have spoken and I WILL DO IT”

all the time God calls us to things that we can not accomplish.  He doesn’t need our help.  but He does invite us into being part of what HE is doing in the world for His glory.

the very next chapter in ezekiel is the chapter where ezekiel prophesies to the valley of dry bones.  at passion, louie giglio spoke on the first night about how the dead can not raise themselves.  ch 37 says that the Lord breathed and they lived.  v.5  ”Thus says the LORD GOD to these dry bones,’ behold I WILL cause breath to enter you and you shall live…”

we’ve been talking a lot about entrustment.  word retreat was about the parable of the talents…and about seeking to find the things that God has entrusted each person with.  i know that sometimes, for me anyway, i know what God is speaking…but i’m afraid (so was the wicked servant—see Matt 25).  What God is speaking to me is that i have nothing to fear.  He knows that everything He’s called me to is too much for me to do.  He knows that i’m too weak…too bad with words, too afraid, too sinful on my own to accomplish anything—YET He has invited me anyway.

and all i have to do is say YES to Him.  HE WILL DO THE REST.  HE WILL ACCOMPLISH IT.  Philippians 1:6 says that i am confident in this, that HE who began a good work in you will be faithful to carry it on to completion.

so why is this so new today if He’s been working on teaching me this for months now?  well chris powell (who brought the word this morning, amen!) was speaking from nehemiah today.  one of my favorite old testament passages is from there about how nehemiah felt a call from the Lord to go rebuild the walls of jerusalem and he completed it from the rubble that was left from when the enemy tore them down.

chris spoke from chapters 1-2.  nehemiah saw the need in ch 1 for the wall to be rebuilt FOR THE NAME OF THE LORD.  he inquired of the Lord to see how he should respond, and the Lord answered him and told him to rebuild the walls.  nehemiah saw the task…and the opposition against it (see ch 4) but He knew what the Lord had said…and he called his men to “rise up and build“. he knew that the Lord would make it happen.  he trusted in the Word and the Call of the Lord, not knowing how it would happen…he just said yes.

i want to believe that the Lord will accomplish the task He has called me to.  that it is HIS work, and that He will do it.  the other day,  my bible study ended with writing and memorizing the words to john 8:32.  it says and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free. as i opened the book i’m reading right now (Kisses from Katie) she had written about the name of her ministry, amazima, which means truth in lugandan.  it came from the verse john 8:32…which says and you will know the truth and the truth will set you free.

this morning God put two and two together and i realized that He’s been telling me the truth…and that He is faithful.  it is truth that when we say yes to His calling—which is ALWAYS bigger than we can handle—that HE WILL COMPLETE IT.

over and over i hear it…and i’m starting to believe it. i know that He has plans for my life that are for my good and HIS GLORY. the truth is: when we say YES to Him, HE WILL DO THE REST.

Yes Lord, walking in the way of your truth, i wait for You, for Your Name and Your Renown are the desire of my heart. amen.         (isa 26:8)

january

i can’t believe that january 2012 is so close to being over already.  i’m amazed at what this year has brought in its short 26 days. they have by far been some of the best 26 days in a long time. i’ve been thinking a lot lately about remembering and how powerful the testimony of the Lord is.

so i’m looking back…but just a little bit…to share about how wonderful He has been to me in january.

but i have to go back just a little further.  back in november God began speaking to my heart about being prepared.  He took me through the parable of the bridesmaids showing me how important it is to be prepared for what He is about to do. He showed me that by myself  i am the unprepared bridesmaid—always a second behind and not fully prepared.  and He showed me that i didn’t want to be like that anymore…so i’m trying– trying to be on time, more prepared, not always so rushed or having my calendar so full.  my iphone calendar helps a lot!    i’m not totally sure what He is teaching me to be prepared FOR…but i know that His word tells us to be prepared for His coming at anytime (and i think that means not just His physical coming…but when He is ready to come and move in/around/through us too).

preparing for word retreat (which i still need to write about) He taught me about being faithful.  word this year was focused on the very next parable in matthew 25…the parable of the talents. i was tasked to speak on the Master from the story.  at first it seemed so impossible because i was charged not to stray from the Master at all—not too much application, and nothing on the servants.  as i began to prepare i suddenly became overwhelmed at how much i wanted to say.  there was no way i could fit into 35 minutes all i wanted to say about who my Master (Jesus) is.  How can i paint a good enough picture of Him  to do Him justice?  i truly have no idea what i said as i spoke, but i do know that the preparation time reminded me so much of who Jesus is to me—and just how much i love Him.

in the midst of the preparation i attended passion 2012 in atlanta with some of our awesome college students.  passion is always amazing—the Word is brought, corporate worship is always incredible, anthems are revealed that will forever remind people of that moment …but this year for me it was nothing to do with any of that.  for me this year it was all about Jesus.(which is passion’s goal…but i mean it was about me and Jesus) it was 4 days of sweet moments of being captured by His Word as it was spoken, being so totally washed again in His love in a new, fresh way that i couldn’t help but get lost in the moment with Him and stand amazed. He spoke to me so personally about how i was using the things that have been entrusted to me and reminded me of the vision HE had  for those things…reminding me that all i have to do is say YES and He will do everything else. (ezekiel 36 taught me that last year) He reminded me that He had greater things in store from my life than i could ever accomplish but if i laid them down in fear of failure He wouldn’t receive that glory that He is due. He also showed me that even though He has absolutely entrusted me i can not do it alone.  i must rely on His strength and allow Him to accomplish the task because only He is able.

He has reminded me about boldness and courage through Paul.

He has reminded me to be faithful in the small things through Moises (a missionary friend who has recently gone to be with Jesus) and through word retreat.  i WANT to hear  Jesus say to me, “well done good and FAITHFUL servant!!!” and i want to know that at the end of my time here it is true of me that i “fought the good fight…” at word He showed us a just a glimpse of how amazing it will be to hear those words and rejoice with Him in heaven…and how much i absolutely want everyone i know to be there with me.

He reminded me of how much i adore my family—the one God linked me to by blood—and the ones He’s allowed me to be adopted in to…and not only how much i love them, but how i want them to love Jesus with all their hearts too.

He has taught me about the possibilities awaiting when i say YES to Him and just take a step toward Him.

He has reminded me of the absolute JOY of walking down His path and serving Him.  sunday night at word retreat (at 2 wednesday nights since then) i was just absolutely blown away by His grace and love that allows me to get to be in a place where He is teaching His children to love and worship and follow Him.  the sight just is almost too much to handle and stay standing.

He has reminded me of the absolute blessing my life is and how i am totally amazed and grateful that i get to be part of such an amazing ministry, at such a wonderful church, full of wonderful people who i love so much, with the BEST stinkin group of students.

He has allowed me opportunities to share about His love with people who don’t know Him, He’s given me knowledge of His will and taught me to pray it also letting me see how when we pray His will HE WILL ANSWER.

He has given me peace when i was totally out of control of situations that have been scary.

He’s let me be there to support friends who are being called to take scary steps—and also let me be there when He confirms over and over the calling and that He is trustworthy with it.

He has filled me…to overflowing. and it’s just january 26.

i can’t imagine what else He has in store…for January.

and february…and march…and all of 2012.

Lord give me the eyes to see You as You continue to move and show Yourself this year.  Let me have the time to take to rejoice in You as i should and give me the courage to continue to be faithful with the things You’ve entrusted me with. 

advent

so lately i’ve been on this idea of preparation.  i’ve been asking over and over, “how is God using this to prepare me for something later?”

i’ve not been just asking it about me and my personal life and walk with Jesus, but also about ministry and as the body of Christ.

i feel like as we’ve moved in to the advent season i’ve been thinking about it in a totally new way this year.

advent is traditionally the time when christians look back to celebrate the coming of the Messiah.  we focus on Jesus being born to Mary and there being no room at the inn.  a lot of time we add extra characters in there like the little drummer boy who played for Jesus or even santa or rudolph.

what i feel like is new this year is that as i look back on Jesus’ birth it propels me forward and prompts me to think of His return.  i’m not generally one to stand on street corners with a sign that says “THE END IS NIGH” or anything, but seriously…advent should remind us that we are to be preparing for Jesus return to earth for the second time.  to be letting His Spirit move in us to mold us into the “light of the world” and the image-barers of Him that we are intended to be.

i LOVE the story in luke 2…the shepherds and the whole host of angels…totally awesome!  but this year the story in Luke 1:39-45 has been on my mind more, it was even preached on today at church.  one of the things that so stands out to me in this story is Elizabeth’s preparation and hospitality to Mary.  Elizabeth is pregnant (with John the baptist) and Mary has become pregnant with Jesus.  Mary goes to visit her cousin Elizabeth.  it doesn’t say in the Word, but i think by E’s response this visit was a spontaneous one.  Elizabeth wasn’t really LOOKING for Mary to show up at her door, but Elizabeth was prepared for a visitor, or at least she seems to be.

Think about it.  if you don’t have everything in order and guests show up to stay for 3 months you’re going to be freaking out and running around to get everything in place.  maybe there aren’t sheets on the guest bed, or you haven’t been to the store in a month.  but elizabeth wasn’t freaking out…instead, she was so prepared and overjoyed at Mary’s visit that she was able to hear from God through the Holy Spirit as He filled her spirit up. She knew exactly what the Spirit was saying to her as baby john the baptist leaped for joy in her womb.   and think how encouraging this word of confirmation must’ve been to Mary who was just doing all she could to be faithful to the Word God had recently spoken to her through the angel gabriel.

Elizabeth was prepared for the coming of her Lord. everything was in order and she was available to not only accept the joy given her from God, but she was able to be a blessing to Mary as well…

Lord, teach me to be prepared for You whenever You move in my life, or call me to move.  Let me be available to hear as You speak.

He’s preparing me

last night i was having dinner with a wonderful friend of mine, and she asked “so what is God up to in your life?”  my reply was simply “i’m not exactly sure”…which implies that i am not aware of what He’s up to…but i mean it more in a way of He’s up to something, i just don’t know what it is.  but as i reflected on her question i learned a few things that He’s doing right now.

first.  He has removed some relationships from my life that have been or could potentially be stumbling blocks.  He’s also graciously done this pretty painlessly. it’s not that there has been any big blow up or anything in them, we’ve just gotten too busy, or live too far apart, or something.  this is a big deal because when i see relationships changing i go into protection mode and normally try to over compensate for fear of losing people.  He’s teaching me right now that creating a wider distance between people doesn’t mean you can’t still love them and enjoy time spent with them when it is possible, these relationships just don’t need to take quite as high a place in my life.

He has also filled places in my life with new, wonderful, Godly friendships with people in the same place in life as me which is also a big deal.

second.  He’s teaching me to learn the lesson before the test comes.  what i mean is He’s saying, “Hey the stove is hot” and i say oh ok i wont touch it then, instead of “hey the stove is hot” and i say “is it?  i’m just going to touch it and see” (to my writer friends…sorry for the horrible use of punctuation there…)

i feel like lately there have been dozens of lessons He’s taught me by watching other people’s interactions with one another.  for example, the other day i witnessed a conversation between two friends and one was saying “you never hang out with me/talk to me etc…” and the second  was saying” i’m just busy…we talk…just not as much as you’d like.  don’t take it personally, i still love you…”  i really felt for the 2nd person.  i know in my life it’s just hard to talk to people that i don’t see everyday in my regular goings-on.  it’s not personal, it’s just hard.  sometimes though i take it too personally and i realized when watching that conversation that He’s really changed ME there to not get so hurt or afraid because i haven’t talked to someone in awhile.

He’s also taught me lessons on showing love and grace in hard situations, about confrontation, healthy relationships, responsibility, faith…

third.  i feel like He’s preparing me.  for what i’m not sure (hence the “i dunno” answer to my friends question).  all these lessons, coupled with so much anticipation for something to come as well as what i feel like is a season of particularly strong attack from the enemy.  he’s in my thoughts, dreams even…ick! i hate that guy!  i feel like i’m distinctly hearing the things he’s planting in my thoughts and seeing the temptations he’s putting in my path and feeling all the gross feelings he tries to bring us down with…

but i also feel a very strong word from the Lord to fight.  He has reminded me why it’s so important to know His Word (ps 119:11)and to be prepared at all times .  i’m so grateful in this time for the preparation of His word that He’s given me up to this point.  i’m grateful for the scripture He’s written on my heart because what i know readily comes to mind when it’s needed.  the Word is truly alive (heb 4:12) and it’s like i feel it zoom to the rescue when satan is throwing a dart at me.  it’s really so cool!

lastly, in the bible study we’ve just finished  (duty or delight by tammie head) she wrote “we do not fight FOR victory…we fight FROM victory”.  Jesus has already won the battle.  satan’s attacks won’t win because Christ sits victoriously now.

it’s a daily reminder to put on the full armor of God (eph 6) and to fight with the Sword of the Spirit which is the Word of God (eph 6:17) and to pray in the Spirit at all times.

Know His Word…it is truth—not the stuff satan tries to put in your mind…fight with scripture—ask if your negative thoughts about yourself or the temptation you’re facing comes from the Lord…if it’s not…combat that negative, wrong thought with the TRUTH of scripture.

and finally…take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ.  don’t let the temptations, the self-loathing thoughts, the things that are not of the Lord, snowball in your life.  stop them before they start…you can overcome your thoughts.

We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. 2 cor 10:5

Lord thank you for preparing and protecting me with Your Word.  Open my eyes that i might see well during this season where You are at work. give me the hunger for your Word that will sustain me and let me prepare well to run the race.

enjoying God

                             the chief end of man is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever.

that is the first part of the westminister chatechism.

t i remember the first time i heard that statement i was listening to john piper talk about it.  it really sparked a new idea of what my relationship with God was to be.

over the past week that statement has come to mind a number of different times. just last night before our wednesday night fathom worship time, i was asking some of our students what their time in the prayer room was like.  i asked why they came to that service, and if they spent that time truly seeking to meet with the Lord.  at the end of our conversation that statement was what i left them with.  the prayer room is to glorify Him because He is worthy and to meet with Him, because that is where we find true satisfaction.

sunday it came up when talking to a student about how they struggle to “really have a relationship with God” because it just seems like rules and expectations.

i’m doing a bible study right now called “duty or delight” by tammie head .  it’s really fabulous.  this morning as i was working through this week’s homework she made this statement:

sometimes life isn’t working for us because God is stirring a holy dissatisfaction.  He wants us to want Him more.

i realized that in the last few months this is where God has been leading me.  to being totally dissatisfied with many things in my life.  He’s shown me through dissatisfaction with friendships that sometimes i rely so much on friends and relationships to make me “happy” or “filled”.  He’s shown me at at times i get dissatisfied with my job because things don’t seem to be moving or it seems like a “dry” or “hard” season of ministry.

i also know that for a long time now He’s been calling me to Himself in different ways…many of which require more effort on my part than the “easy” relationship i was trying to have with Him.

and once i admitted what He was asking me to do, i realized that not doing it was disobedience…and that my disobedience plus looking for fulfillment in other “spiritual” things was why i was so dissatisfied in that season of life.

so here’s what i’ve learned:

that putting forth whatever it takes to be obedient to God is absolutely more of a blessing than a sacrifice.

that when you have a situation that requires you don’t talk about it to other people, you talk about it to God more…and by talking to Him MORE and FIRST you actually hear clearly…from Him…which helps you to walk obediently and freely…in His will. AND that not having to “figure things out”, “think them through”, “talk them out” before you lift it up in prayer allows you to actually surrender those things and yourself to Him without having to freak out about knowing what to do!

that more time with Him is truly greater than any time anywhere else.

that when you surrender to Him and come to Him first, He will do CRAZY awesome things (duh…its in the bible…)

that He WILL satisfy.  totally. completely.  He is TOTALLY enough.  TOTALLY sufficient.  nothing needs to be added.  nothing will make Him “cooler”. He and His Word are enough in anything. always…and He has reminded me of that.

He is AWESOME.

john piper said, “God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him.”

 in duty or delight, tammie head wrote: “He knows that we are most happy when we are most satisfied in Him…”

in the margin next to this sentence i wrote “the highest end of man is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever”…i flipped the page and read a few more paragraphs, and saw that she ended this section of homework with the quote: “the chief end of man is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever.”

He is so wonderful…

thank You Lord that you are teaching me to learn again how to enjoy You.  

obedience…

1 samuel 15:22

Has the LORD as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices,
as in obeying the voice of the LORD?
Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice

isaiah 1:19

If you are willing and obedient,
you shall eat the good of the land

2 years-ish ago i started this blog because i wanted to go through the psalms and discover what treasure was there about the character of who God is.  because i stink at commitments like this, or the gym, i gave up after awhile.

yesterday i had a conversation about obedience with a good friend of mine.  he said the word obedience but i feel like it rang in my ears 6 or 7 times.  i knew that God was highlighting it to me, but today i discovered that for awhile now He has been calling me and i have not been responding obediently.  He was very clear in His message to me that i’m not being faithful to what He is speaking to me…and therefore i’m not hearing what else He is saying.

i love His word.  it always amazes me.  He speaks and changes my life and thoughts through it.  it heals and teaches and everything else is says in 2 tim 3:16 (and elsewhere).  it’s my favorite thing…but i’ve not been in it; not like He’s called me to.  i’ve been lazy.

and He’s calling me to prayer.  not praying…but a lifestyle that seeks Him above all else and listens and hears what He is saying; to spend time not only in His word but in His Presence.

and so with my great friend Alyson, i’m going through psalm 119. meditating on and praying through the power of the word expressed in that psalm.

i also am going to try to keep the posts short…but really, that’s hard for me.

2 peter 1 :3-4

seeing that His divine power has granted to us everything pertaining to life and godliness, through the true knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and  excellence.  For by these He has granted to us His precious and magnificent  promises, so that by them you may become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world by lust.

lessons from canoeing

this weekend we took 50 kids canoeing.  this is always my favorite “fun” thing we do all year.  it’s an intense 3 days on the river  and camping over night.  as always it is a crazy trip…and this weekend was even crazier than usual—but as God does, He spoke so many things through this trip.

1.  the boss man asked if i would “bring up the rear” this year and be the last boat.  i think it was a nice way of saying “you’ll prolly be sorta slow, so just stay at the back” (which we proved not so true today by being the last boat to leave and the first boat to arrive at the end point…but whatever.)  so my canoe buddy, Kaitlin, and i were the last ones in the river.  this wasn’t my first time on the river and not that i’m awesome at the whole rowing a boat thing…but i’m not horrible either.  so i went into this weekend feeling pretty ok about my ability to make it down the river.  not 30 minutes into our  trip we hit a TINY branch and flip—our stuff went EVERYWHERE…but we got it recovered and drained all the water from our boat with some help and made it back on our way.

so what did i learn?  that no matter how confident i am in my own ability to do something, i can’t rely on that.  God reminded me that i always need His help, i always need Him to go before me, and walk beside me.  He seems to remind me every time i think i can do something on my own that i can’t.

2. (these are in no real order, except how they came to my mind.) today He reminded me that hard work pays off.  like i mentioned already, Kaitlin and i started off last each day.  we sorta floated and relaxed the first two days just chillin on the water.  today, we decided that there were very capable people at the back and that we wanted to actually canoe with other people near us, so we paddled HARD.  eventually, we ended up as the first boat in the pack.  this process taught me more than one thing…

A.  hard work pays off.  seriously, i’m not a super canoe-er.  i tend to guide the boat all zig-zaggy across the river and accidentally run into other boats.  today kaitlin and i tried harder.  i paid more attention to steering the boat so it would go straight-ish instead of zig-zaggy.  it worked…mostly.  and hard work pays off.  no matter that we weren’t the best canoe-ers, we pushed ourselves majorly…it hurt—physically, but we went straight-ish and ended up at the front.

B.  making goals for yourself is excellent.  the way we moved ourselves up the pack of boats was finding one particular boat we wanted to pass.  we made lots of little goals and celebrated ALL of them.  i think we got so into it that it surprised us when we actually made it to the front boats—we couldn’t believe it because small goals were achieved and added together accomplished a bigger goal.  also…making goals for yourself allows you to not just “do what everyone else is doing”.  it pushes you out of the status-quo where everyone is doing what everyone is doing.

C. just because you get to the front (top, meet your goal…whatever) doesn’t mean you can stop rowing your hardest. we FINALLY made it through the few boats at the back, the MASS CHAOS in the middle where most of the boats were, and to the front pack of 4 or 5 boats.  for awhile we were the very front boat.  we were in the mix of that front pack, but we were the first boat.  i guess because we’d worked so hard to get there we wanted a break (or our throbbing arms did) and so we slacked off for awhile in our rowing.  one boat passed us, then another…and suddenly we were back behind 4 other boats.  while we celebrated  getting to the front (and we really did…we were super proud of ourselves!!!) , after awhile we grew tired and complacent with our “race” against everyone else and slowed down.   we didn’t have another goal and so we had nothing to “go for” anymore except the end of the trip.

our walk with Christ is SO MUCH like this.  first, we can’t do this life without His help in EVERYTHING…we can’t rely on our own ability or strength to do anything, He is the one who is able (ephesians 3:20) in everything and strong when we are weak (2 Cor 12:9).  second, we need to set goals for ourselves in our walk.  small, attainable, foreseeable goals.  goals that over time accomplish a larger goal.  it’s the whole not “biting off more than you can chew” thing.  we often fail when we try to “cold turkey” drop old habits, or suddenly “change our ways” into new habits…but allowing the Holy Spirit to guide us slowly, step by step, one goal at a time will over time allow for Christ to reign in our hearts and show through our lives, changing us from the inside, out. these slow steps will allow for true heart change instead of outward habit changes that only last as long as new year’s resolutions.  and lastly, when we attain a goal that the Holy Spirit has led us to, we can’t stop there.  we have to keep going following His lead to the next thing He has for us in life.  we can’t memorize a few scriptures or go on one mission trip and call that good.  just like in the river, when we stopped paddling we floated further and further back from where we wanted to be.  the Holy Spirit is always moving us forward, and we have to persevere in our walk…pressing onward toward the goal (heb 12:1-2, 2 tim 4:7-8) that is sanctification by the Spirit, becoming more and more like Jesus as we walk through life.  when we stop pursuing Him and His desires and goals for us we become more and more guided by our own desires and flesh, and less by His Spirit.

3. the last one i will mention here is that His ways are not always our ways… (isa 55:9) but a good attitude can allow something stinky to be something good (rom 8:28). it rained a LOT this weekend.  i remember the first night, as the tarps over our heads were failing and  i was getting SOAKED in my hammock, asking God to please stop the rain and let me sleep for just a little while.  He didn’t. everything that didn’t get soaked when it fell into the river got soaked that night.  it stayed wet until…well, it’s still wet—i haven’t put it in the dryer yet.  not only was it wet—there was mud everywhere.  like the sticky, you sink 3 feet down every step you take kind of mud.  the second day it didn’t start raining until after we’d set up camp (praise Jesus!) but it did pour…and pour.  more mud…more wetness.  and did i mention that to get to our second camp site you had to walk STRAIGHT up a 10 foot mud hill? good luck with that…it didn’t happen.  sooooo we were wet…and stuck…and muddy—with a GREAT hill right next to the river.  one of the kids decided to make a mud slide. we were already DISGUSTING and wet…so why not embrace it?  make the best use of the circumstances.  we did—and it was AWESOME…a super great bonding, friendship building time.

so thank you Jesus for wet, muddy, rainy nastiness…it was awesome.

what if…

today was an awesome day.  actually, it’s been an awesome week.  hard, long, frustrating…beautiful, and really fun.

 tonite sorta just happened though—and it has left me thinking…a lot.

i’d mentioned to a friend about the prayer labyrinth that i wrote about the other day and he asked tonite how late it was open.  it was closing by the time this conversation happened, so luckily for me we just went and grabbed food instead and chatted, which always is a great time.

this particular friend happens to be great at just talking to people, which is something i stink at—but it’s only cos i’m scared and psych myself out.  anyway, he struck up a conversation with our waiter and mentioned to him about coming to an easter service at his church.

just a few weeks ago, i’d heard a sermon on exactly that—inviting someone to easter church.  on the importance of easter in our faith, and the AWESOME news of Christ’s resurrection—and how to invite someone to hear that.  and that’s what my friend did.

sidebar—it was also so cool, because it’s something i so wish i was able to do, and so it was stinkin cool to just see it happen so easily and naturally.

so tonite as i was reflecting on the day and talkin with Jesus, i thought of this guy, prayed for his mom (cos he’d said she had gotten injured recently—yeah the waiter said all this)…then thought about the possibility of him actually going to church this weekend.

so go with me…WHAT IF this guy has never heard the gospel or good news of Jesus before.

WHAT IF he says, “what the heck…maybe i’ll check out that church.”

WHAT IF he hears the gospel…and responds–maybe this week…or maybe some week down the road.

WHAT IF he begins attending church regularly…then begins to bring his mom

WHAT IF he begins to pray, and get involved in a small group or campus ministry at his school.

WHAT IF Jesus begins to change his heart—and people notice

WHAT IF those people begin to ask questions…and he shares his new faith—even though he’s not really sure about all the details.

WHAT IF he wants to know more—and begins to ask questions or have a relationship with a mentor person within the church.

WHAT IF he then feels a call from the Lord on his life

WHAT IF HE RESPONDS WITH “HERE I AM LORD”

WHAT IF he raises his children in the church…

WHAT IF  they see him being a church leader

WHAT IF he leads people to Christ

WHAT IF he becomes a vessel for the gospel to reach the unchurched and countless lives and generations are changed because of his ministry…

WHAT IF…

but what if the invitation hadn’t been offered…sure, other opportunities might’ve come up for him to come to Christ.

i dunno…but tonite the idea of missed opportunities…and possibilities that are not possible because of those missed opportunities has really been opened up to me.  who knows if this opportunity will result in fruit being produced for the kingdom of God—but i know for sure that at least the opportunity was taken to invite someone in to hear the glorious news of Christ’s defeat of death that we might be reconciled with God.

i’m scared, shy, i don’t know what to say…but that is really no excuse—it’s just a way of making me feel ok about all the missed opportunities.  this is what God is laying on my heart—and what He’s been saying for awhile.

i know what He’s called us to do…what He’s called ME to do…and i know that i must respond—yes or no.  and i know that every delay is a “no” to the Lord.  i have to be intentional—to get out of my comfy church bubble and trust Him.  i want to go—to spread the Good News…especially this easter…THIS is the greatest day in all of history…when the power of hell and death was defeated in the name of Love.

we watch the passion around easter…and ask “why did that have to happen?”, or “why did He have to go through that?”

He didnt HAVE to…He chose to.  He chose to because it was the only way that the people that God created…that had fallen so far from Him…could be with Him.  He could have said no (and whatever…we can debate theology later if you disagree) and if He’d said no there would have been no hope for us.

it was and IS the only way. JESUS IS THE ONLY WAY.

He chose to do it to be with me…and you—and every other person that we have the opportunity to tell about Him.  so what if He’d said no…?  what if we say no…?

Lord help me be obedient to your call and go out living and being your disciple, spreading your Good News.